I love language. I love the way words feel in my mouth and how they travel through time and across continents to merge and blend into tools we use to be seen, heard, understood, and feel less alone. English, Spanish, American Sign Language, and a smattering of French were my familiars. And then there was math...
Math was a language that brought me a different form of enjoyment. The structure and organization combined with room for exploration was a welcome reprieve from the fluidity of interpretation the other languages requested. Those days feel so far away. English is all I have left and I struggle with word recall, spelling, and organization of thought. Too much focus on trying to learn new words, concepts, or equations and my brain becomes overtaxed and shuts my whole body down. Instead, I stare at the pages and imagine my cells hold the memory of how to do things my brain isn't equipped to engage in right now. I know it's important to not live in comparison of who I was or who I want to be, but on this day when my precious gray matter couldn't keep up, I will continue to hold onto the possibility of someday.
What about you? What are the skills you've watched diminish? How do you walk gently with yourself, in regards to them? How do you hold on to them?
As always, thank you for participating in this with me. - Tonya Butts